Engagement Party For The Ages

Our engagement party was amazing!!!!

There were all these little details there that I can't imagine how my mother pulled off. It was this fantastic party that brought together all the people Easy and I love all into one place.

It alleviated my fears of how well our two families would mix. It also set the stage for a rocking party come February.

I definitely want my wedding to be a big party. Now I really believe that's a possibility.

Up next is writing all the thank you notes for the party. I hate writing thank you notes, but I'm really so grateful to everyone for coming, I will just suck it up and go for it.

Although the party went well, I'm really glad the next event isn't until December. I'm interested to see how that will play out with so many women from my family and Easy's will fit together into one event.

Trying to keep down the stress in life isn't as easy as it usually it. Wedding planning stress, plus short-handed-at-work-whilst-also-training stress, plus settling into life with the fiance stress is a lot. We're trying to stay grounded, and so far it's working.

What should I do to deal with the stress that doesn't involve alcohol or something reckless?

Back From The Dead!

My phone is back! Oh yeah!!

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I'm feeling very happy because I don't have to shell out unexpected money to get a new Blackberry. I already had to do that last month for my car breaks. Goodness, this being an adult thing isn't all it's cracked up to be.

I knew that, but I prefer to focus on the positive. And I'm positively happy my phone decided to just start working again.

I miss my friends. I need to catch up with them. I've barely updated <a href="http://quitethelovelife.blogspot.com/">my other blog</a> with info on their love lives.

And my parents would normally be concerned I'd fallen off the face of the earth. But their new son, Easy is waaay better at keeping in touch than I am. So they know I'm alive 'cause they both talk to him a couple times a week. I think it's pretty sweet actually.

Even though there's so much going on all the time with friends, family, work, romance, and wedding, I finally feel like I can breathe. Maybe it's because I"m getting in a groove. Maybe it's cause Easy and I finally settled an issue that's been hanging out in the background for a while. I'm not sure entirely, but I feel good.

I'm tired as hell cause I only got 3 hours of sleep last night, but I feel good.

I have a very busy weekend coming up with this engagement party, but I feel good.

My apartment still isn't completely unpacked, but I feel good.

Smile!

Put On The Kettle!

Hello hive!

I'm Miss Kettle. I'm so excited be here. I wish there was a way to convey through words the extent of my joy. I could try, but I'm not a writer, I'm a scientist. My grasp of spelling and grammar is no small feat in itself, so I will accept that proper word choice is just outside my grasp.

That, my new friends, is why God made Google. It's my best buddy on the Internet. There's nothing Google can't do. Well, that's not true. But there are no Internet needs of mine that it can't meet. The best example of this was when Mr. Kettle went to Europe for a month last winter and we were able to talk on the phone and video chat -- for free-- through Google (technically gmail, but it's the same thing). But I digress...

Through Google, I can find pictures to try and express my joy.

Image via bitstorm.org

Nah, that's not really it. But I am having fond memories of my childhood while also wondering why in the world my parents let me watch that show!

Image via ravensquetarot.com

Yeah, now that's more like it. This joy is not mine alone because Mr. Kettle is really excited too. He was very supportive of my plan to be a Bee and almost submitted the application for me. Thank goodness it was still too soon to apply because I wanted to go over my application myself and have my voice shine through.

Now that I've done my very best to express how happy I am to be a Bee, let's talk about how I got here. Mr. Kettle and I first discussed marriage very early on in what was a short courtship. It was the night of Mardi Gras that we decided we'd be married by that time the following year. Almost immediately after that, I started looking at wedding websites and Google sent me to Weddingbee. I fell in love instantly and had dreams of being a Bee myself one day.

Mr. Kettle and I overshare, so I told him of my new obsession with wedding websites and surprisingly, he didn't back off the discussion of marriage or the development of our relationship. Possible "crazy" label avoided. Winning!

When we were officially engaged (he liked it so he put a ring on it), I realized there was only a short amount of time before we were at the 8-months-out-mark and I could apply to Weddingbee. Well, they rejected my first application pretty quickly. I was sad, very sad.

personal bmp

I didn't cry, but I was wondering why I couldn't be fascinating enough to catch their attention. I took another look at my blog and tried to figure out what to do. I began tailoring my blog posts as if I were actually a weddingbee blogger, which meant more pictures, more details of how I arrived at decisions, projects, and feelings.

As soon as four weeks passed (technically a few days before..) I submitted a second application. Then it was all wedding blogging every day. My personal blog became wedding central. Mr. Kettle spoke of how I "better be a Bee blogger this time after all this". He is very passionate you see.

But it paid off! I got the e-mail from Pengy (I call her that 'cause everyone else does) and I was over-joyed. I was at work when I read it so I had to do my best to contain my glee. It was hard. Real hard.

I called Mr. Kettle and after a bit of phone tag, he got the good news. He was just as happy as I was. Then we hashed out what my icon would be. Knowing that he would have to be Mr.______, he wanted something that was manly. He didn't say that outright, but I got that vibe after he ruled out both bracelet and petit four.

He wanted ticket, But I really wanted sunhat. He probably frowned (we were over the phone so I can't be sure) and then we played a game we're very good at. This game is called compromise. We decided on an icon that fit us as a couple and one that both of us would be proud to be the Mr.______ and Miss ______. Ultimately, kettle it was.

We drink a lot of tea, so I think it fits. We're very warm, we like bright colors, and with all the music we constantly have around us, the tea kettle whistle fits us too.

I look forward to months of blogging and having you all go with me through this planning process. I've already done some DIY projects and I will be glad to share those with you.

Here are the Kettles (and our cat Belle). These are both personal photos.

she thinks she's people

he's turned me into a pseudo-cuddler

The New Buzz In My Life

Hey y'all, I've got great news! This news comes with good news. Also, depending on how you take it, there is other news. Weddingbee accepted my application to become a blogger!!!

I've chosen the icon of Kettle, so by all means head over there and become engrossed in all things wedding. That's the good news.

The depending-on-how-you-take-it news is that I will not be blogging about my wedding planning process nearly as much on this blog. I will, finally, get back to talking about the rest of my life.

With my work shifts and all the wedding planning, there's not a whole lot of other life stuff going on, but it does happen. I'm just glad my obsessiveness paid off.

For any readers I have that could care less about my wedding planning, this is a great development. For those who do care, I'll put a link right at the top of the page on my blog so you can find my Weddingbee blog.

The next post that goes up will be my welcome post for Weddingbee. After that, it'll be regular CeCe. I promise I won't start calling myself Miss Kettle here.

You're Such A Tool, But Yet I Love You

I have two major tools in my life. One is my super sexy wedding binder from russel+hazel.

The other is our wedding website.

I don't know what I would do without these two tools. I love them wholeheartedly.

I carried my wedding binder around with me everywhere I went. Somewhere between coming to terms with our old wedding venue and some bridesmaid-dress related stress, I stopped carrying it.

It sat by the door, ready to be carried along every time I left the house. Instead, I would glower at it as I walked past. It just sat there in it's adorable carrying bag I bought at Staples.

I paid more attention to the website. But I really focused my attention on the part people would see (such as the screen shot above). Well, that and the guest list.

The guest list caused me no small amount of grief. Getting the list whittled down, tracking down addresses, and getting them all into the website was a very involved project.

But then the clouds parted. I saw on the website a very easy format to put the guest list info into that would make it very easy to upload into the computer. I'm a hgue fan of putting in a lot of work on the front in to never have to do it again.

Once that happened, things got better. Suddenly, my fiance Easy and his mother were able to track down their addresses. My parents became a big help in getting our Save-the-Dates out.

And then the best thing ever happened: we changed our wedding venue back to the place I'd been secretly pining for since we first saw it.

This actually looks a lot like a Justin Alexander ad with my exact dress on weddingwire. I couldn't get the ad to come up of course, so no screenshot. Sorry.

Oh, but I did go to the Justin Alexander website and I found it. I'm hesitant to post it because Easy still hasn't seen my dress. If he promises not to look, I'll post it. You promise not to peek, Easy? Okay, everyone else scroll down and you'll see it.












I knew you'd look! That's why I didn't put up the ad. Perhaps eventually I will show it, cause I really love the ad and I'm going to save it as an inspirational picture for my photographer for the day of the wedding.

Moving on. Being the reasonable person I try to pretend I am from time to time, I never outright said I wanted that venue and no others. But when it finally happened, I felt a weight lifted. I didn't even know that weight was there, but I sure as hell noticed when it was gone.

Monday, on my way out the door, I stopped and picked up my wedding binder and bag. I took it with me to work. I even cracked it open at work and began filling in the stuff I'd neglected for 2 months. I took out stuff I didn't need anymore.

Besides all the work I do at work, I felt very productive wedding-wise. It's amazing to come out of doldrums you didn't even know you were in. I knew I felt some kind of way about my wedding binder, but I didn't know just how bad it was until I didn't feel that way anymore.

And now I love all my wedding tools again. Checklists, guest lists, and menus, oh my!

Extra, Extra, Read All About It!

My best man, Lion, has an older brother who was engaged while we were in college. His wedding party was spread out geographically. The best way for him to keep everyone in the loop was to let them know is a very classic way: a newsletter.

I loved this idea then, and I love it still now. While we have five people in our wedding party out of town, that's actually only a small fraction of our hugely large wedding party. But needing to keep everyone on the same page has been... a task.

In order to better serve the needs of our sanity, I came up with a great newsletter. This isn't just for the bridesmaids though.

It will go to the bridesmaids, the jr. bridesmaids and bridal attendants, the groomsmen, the parents of the flowers girls and ring bearers, and also to the ushers and hostesses. That's a lot o' mail to send out. But it will be worth it to keep anything from falling through the cracks.

I'm not sure how often I'll have to do these newsletters, but this one was right before the 6 months-to-wedding mark, so there's no way to tell.

In this newsletter, I covered:

• an introduction of who was all in the wedding party (there's over 25 total)
• a reminder of our engagement party in 2 weeks
• information about our changed venue
• clothing FAQs, as we're coming up on the date to order these items
• other cute-sy things.

I tried to make it interesting visually and interesting to read. Lots of white space, nice graphics, pictures, and a fluid layout are all essential to making a great newsletter.

It wouldn't be my first choice, but I made the whole thing in our wedding colors. The taupe came out a bit too orange, but I think it will do.

I imagine I'll have to do another one of these at least in December right before the bridal luncheon. And probably another one in January for the wedding shower and bachelor/bachelorette party. And of course, one with final instructions leading up to the wedding weekend.

And of course, by now you're dying to see the newsletter. No? Well, I want you to see it anyway. Tell me what you think of the layout. I used a screenshot so you could see the intended taupe color instead of what came out of the printer.

The writing really didn't look as small on the printout as it looks in the picture. I hope they like it. I didn't intend to come up with anything so awesome that people are putting it in their scrapbooks, but I did want to keep them abreast of everything without having to make 40 calls.

Score one for finding a way to have less stress with my gargantuan wedding party.

My Mansion For A Day

If you still read my now completely wedding-centric blog, you may be asking yourself what's so fantastic about the Patrick C. Haley Mansion that I could be on the edge of giddiness at the thought of having my wedding there.

Well, I finally unloaded all the pictures from my camera so I can shower you with a barrage of loveliness to help you understand just why I am happy. I am writing the post ahead of time, and God willing, the contract will be signed with the Mansion by the time this post publishes.

So without further ado...


When you first walk up, you think, what a lovely looking mansion. Gosh, I hope those steps aren't slippery.



This is what it looks like when you first walk in to the ballroom. Stairs leading down to tables, chandeliers, and a garden through the windows. Cue contented sighs.



Even if you don't drink, how can you not be enthralled by the beauty and sophistication of this bar. That would be open. For the entire wedding. Open. The whole time. I'm just saying.



This is the front of the ballroom, where the ceremony would take place indoors. See the skylight? See the garden through the endless windows? Yeah, that's hot.



Then, turn to look at the ballroom from up front where the ceremony would be held. Gosh, it's lovely. And look at the head table, all made up. Don't you simply have to take a closer look?



This almost makes me want to have a real head table. Almost. But there's just too many of us. But the chair covers are amazing, as is the silver and gold on the tableware. Begin to drool, and not over the food.



Say, you're getting married in February. Are you really considering sneaking outdoors for a few *hopefully* in-the-snow photos? After seeing this, yeah, you are.



You hear about all the lovely spaces around the mansion upstairs to explore before the ceremony and during cocktail hour. You imagine people mingling. You also imagine one of your feistier friends sneaking up here during the reception...



Oooh, more to explore? All those chairs are included? Winning!



There's a third floor?? What's up there? Suites for the wedding party! Is it just me or does this room look like an upscale barber shop/cigar club? I have been envisioning photos of Easy getting ready in this room since I first laid eyes on it.



After seeing the guys' room, I waited with bated breath to see the bride's room. And it is ah-mazing! Perfectly round, bright windows, lots o' floor space to accommodate my ridiculously large number of bridesmaids. Good times. You don't even see the abundance of mirrors in this photo.



Eventually, the tour is over. On the way out, this is a last look at the ballroom from the outside. Yup, there's a fountain there too. I hope they put twinkle lights on it in the winter...

 So.... do you get it? Do you see why this place is perfect for me? Every time I envision my wedding, I see it as a big party for lots of people Easy and I love. The party is fancy, cause that's how I roll, but it's also in a setting that speaks to my love for beauty and nature.

The hands-on service they provide isn't half bad either. The one thing I couldn't show through the photos is the smell of the food they were cooking the day I took all these pics. It smelled amazing! I can't wait for the tasting.

Changing Wedding Venues... Again

The "again" in the title of this post isn't exactly fair. We only put down a deposit on one location. We have, however, settled on a location more than once only to change our minds.

So what happened?

Glad you asked.

Thursday evening, my mother calls me with fretful concern over our choice of venue. There are a number of reasons she listed, but the top two were:

1. She'd heard from reputable sources that they tend to... shuttle people in and out on the day of their event.

This could be a valid complaint since they hold multiple events in multiple rooms on the same day.

2. She was worried that no one room was large enough to accommodate our guests and we would be crowded into two adjoining rooms. The thought of having a "B" room where people can't easily see the first dance or the cake cutting, and have to hear toasts through a speaker had become increasingly less appealing. Just imagine them trying to shove into the doorway to watch the proceedings.

Add to these two very reasonable concerns an uneasy feeling in her stomach/heart/mind, and she had a pretty convincing argument on her hands.

My family rarely uses emotions in their arguments, so when we do, others take notice and it carries extra weight.

So Easy and I went by my parents' house after his gig and we talked numbers. We tried to figure out our options. We had already put down a deposit with our first venue and didn't want to lose that money.

My first love (no not the Botanic Garden, that was just a fantasy) was the Haley Mansion in Joliet.

Imagine it with snow for February.

It seemed originally outside our price point for budget. But we moved around some numbers and it seemed feasible.

On Friday, my mother and father drove to Joliet to take a look at the mansion. My father finally understood what the fuss was all about. The question was now how to sort out the issue of the deposit.

But we were in luck! The mansion and the chateau are owned by the same people! They told my parents they could transfer the deposit from one venue to the other after they sign the contract with the second venue.

It still feels less than real that I will actually have my wedding at my dream venue. It just has so much to offer. The third floor, for example, is dedicated entirely to the wedding party having a place to hang out and get ready.

I want to jump for joy, but I will hold it in until the contract is signed and the deposit is transferred. If you'll excuse me, I have to go change around several things on my wedding website.

Can You Wear Your Birthday Suit To Your Engagement Party?

There is something that is gravely important One should wear clothes to their own engagement party. I'm serious, it's truly important.

No matter how much you want to bury your head in the sand and try and forget about the million and one details of wedding planning, you must take time and find actual clothes to wear. Not doing that is against the law.

Shopping for an e-party dress should be fun. It's a cocktail party after all and I love shopping. What could be better?

Well, I think I put too much pressure on myself. I don't really have the time or money to shop the way I'd like. And I had the silly notion I should wear our wedding colors. There's only one problem with that. Regency isn't really in right now.


left to right: regency, black, tan, ivory, gold

Color fail.
 So I branched out. I found a great dress at Delia's that I bought. I know you want to see it.



Dress from Delia's

 Because I am so very short, it stops right at my knees, making it perfect cocktail length. And it's a great color for summer. But it's just... plain. I'd have to jazz it up. I and don't really do jazzy.

I don't have a blingy belt or jewelry or anything else like that. Sexy high heeled shoes is about all I have. So this dress would require waaay more shopping to get it perfect.

So I am now searching for either another dress or some killer accessories. Of course, I'm starting with Macy's because that store never lets me down. They had tons to choose from. I wanted something cute and sexy, but not too sexy. I wanted it simple, but not too plain. I hope I can come up with more focus for my other pre-wedding outfits.

Here are some of my favorites.


Ralph Lauren One Shoulder Dress

 Sexy and simple. But is it too simple? And should I really be wearing black to a party in the middle of August? I don't know.



Ellen Tracy Sleeveless Floral Print Dress

 Girly and sweet, but is it sexy? On me, it will go below my knee and it looks like something I'd wear to church or work maybe...



Nine West Beaded One Shoulder Dress

 Let's be honest, one shoulder dresses are not my thing. I only own one and it was forced upon me through participation in a wedding. And perhaps it's too sexy? And I will clash with all the golden decorations, won't I?



Jessica Howard Asymmetrical Cocktail Dress

 This one is actually called a cocktail dress. And it's exactly my style. But is it too sweet? Is it too blue? And might it be too hot for an August party at which I'll already be nervous?


BCBGMAXAZRIA One Shoulder Mini Cocktail Dress

 Everything this man makes looks great on me. It's sexy and a soft tone, so I wouldn't be overdoing it. But I have a small frame. Perhaps it's just one detail too many. That's a lot o' ruffles. And I have a small frame, but not small hips. Le sigh.



Ellen Tracy Sleeveless Sheath

 This one kept catching my eye, but when I look at it, all I can think is my grandmother telling me I need more color and pizazz in my wardrobe. This dress is just my style though. But perhaps it's not enough.

I think a trip to an actual store is due. I will have fun trying on dresses. Whenever I find a sales associate to bond with, I always buy a dress. So here's hoping there's someone there who can be wowed by my ability to look good in any dress (except ones with too many ruffles. those are not my friends).

To RSVP Or To Not RSVP

That is the question. I've been very worried about how RSVPs will go for all our wedding events because of two people, namely my mother and my fiance.

In dramatic fashion, I've been drawing the back of my hand to my forehead and sighing worriedly that no one will RSVP to our events. Don't worry, I knew they'd come, I just figured we'd never be able to get an accurate head count ahead of time.

This is because those two have put out into the world horrible RSVP karma. They never RSVP. Okay, that's an exaggeration. They hardly ever RSVP for things. I'm praying that others don't do to us what my mother and fiance have done to them.

Our e-party invites have gone out and on them people are asked to either call/text my mother with their RSVP or go to our wedding website and do it. There have already been some RSVPs online which only brings a smile to my face.

There are rebels too. One of our friends RSVP'd through Facebook on Easy's wall. And he wanted to bring a plus one. Easy had to inform him that he wasn't getting a plus one for our e-party or any other wedding event.

That's rough to say, but if we're not inviting family members and close friends of our own, we certainly don't have room for extra random people two and three degrees of separation away.

I think the rules of plus ones are pretty simple. Spouses, children living in the house, significant others in years-long relationships, those who live together, and engaged peoples. The one exception to this is if someone is invited who knows no one there other than the bride or groom.

But so far so good on the RSVP front. I can deal with the occasional Facebook RSVP or even just someone calling me to ask me to RSVP for them online. As long as those people are in the minority, I can hang.

Here's a tip for anyone planning a party of any kind: Don't forget to put a date by which you want people to RSVP!! I forgot to do that. Luckily, we only need a head count 3 days before the event. Luck was on my side with this. I won't make that mistake again, trust me.

Music To My Ears

The first vendors we booked were our musicians. Finding the right musician in the right price range can make a bride go crazy. That will not happen to me because I am marrying a musician. Winning!

The day Easy announced our engagement on Facebook, he asked who would play at our wedding for free and several people responded. He was joking, but he definitely took them up on their offer.

Three guys who all play in the same jazz trio each individually offered, so that basically settled the question of what music we'd have for our cocktail hour between the ceremony and reception. Live jazz perfectly fits the mood we're going for with the time of day, passed hors d'oeuvres, and open bar.

We needed ceremony musicians as well. We happened to be heading to an open bar with some friends who (now that I see everything in terms of the wedding) were basically a mixture of wedding guests and groomsmen.

We passed by Bar Louie, which is one of my fave hangs in Chicago. Seated outside was an old friend of Easy's. She happens to be a fantastic violin player (I think. Maybe the viola??), and she's part of a string quartet. Easy told her she should play at our wedding and she readily agreed. Now we had our ceremony music.

While I was wondering about what we'd do for the reception, Easy explained he'd already taken care of it. A friend of his from St. Louis who is a DJ had already agreed to DJ our wedding reception as a wedding gift. A couple of times when we went out in St. Louis, this guy was the DJ, so I know I love what he spins.

It all just seemed to good to be true. A string quartet, a jazz trio, and a DJ all for the price of paying just the string quartet?!? Both my mother and I were thrilled.

Of course we'll be paying everyone something. I've never been one to take advantage of someone's kindness. I am, however, grateful that I will get so much amazing music for my wedding at a really affordable price.

That means more money in the budget for flowers! And I love me some flowers. It's time for musical instrument and flower porn!