My Home Is My Castle

I don't strut around as if I'm running things in the place, but I do feel like royalty in my home. Taking steps to make our new apartment special and cozy is becoming a fun and accidentally long-term project. I thought it would be like when I've moved into previous apartments; I'd have everything unpacked in one weekend.

I wrote a post recently about settling into my new apartment.

Since then, we've been slowly but surely turning it into home. Our big bedroom still isn't unpacked. And it seems to be getting worse not better. So now our thing is to figure out how to prioritize our home. Things as simple as vacuuming don't happen like they should. We're not home enough for it to matter, but our shedding cat makes it more important.

If I'm only home sleeping between shifts and Easy is only home taking a nap between his day job and his night gigs, when it is supposed to get done?

Here are our options:

I Could Become A Housewife
I do have a penchant for wearing A-line skirts that have a lot o' fabric. And I bake a mean casserole. Perhaps I could give up my job and stay home like the little lady I could be. I would pick up after my man and have a piping hot dinner and a perfectly chilled martini waiting for him when he got home from work.

Wait, our collective annual salary is just over 100K. I'm not giving that up just so our one area rug gets vacuumed.

Image via Photobucket

We Could Get A Maid
A Maid who we paid to come in a clean the blinds, mop the floors, wash the clothes, and of course vacuum would be lovely!

We would give her bonuses at Christmas. And I feel very strongly about this, so we'd give her something toward medical insurance. It's be great. Maybe she'd be very traditional, wearing one of those maid outfits. Oh wait. Hell no.

Image via Fun House Theatrical

We Could Get Rid Of ALL Our Stuff
Why finish unpacking? We can't take all our stuff to New York anyway. Plus, we're registering for more stuff for the wedding. We need to downsize. I wouldn't want to do a yard sale because there's no way to make that happen realistically out of an apartment in crowded Hyde Park in Chicago.

There is another way...

Image via WizBangBlog

Eh, that might get us in trouble with the law. I'm pretty sure Chicago's fire code doesn't allow that...


So what shall we do? I guess we'll have to grow the hell up and make time to keep our home feeling like the castle it could be.


Image via CTRiverValley.com

 Or maybe I'll just keep repeating, "my home is my castle" until it magically comes true. Where is a fairy godmother when you need one?

Back On The Exercise Bandwagon

I've been getting back in shape, y'all. Cue pleasantly surprised applause. Crickets? Darn.

Well, I haven't been doing it for very long, so there's a chance I'll fall right back off again, but I have hope. The other bride bloggers on weddingbee.com have inspired me to not neglect my fitness just because I've got more demands on my time right now. Here's what I've been up to:

Diet

I haven't been eating the best diet, but I haven't been eating too badly and I certainly haven't gained any weight. I do have the lucky (I think?) benefit of the opposite of stress eating. When I'm stressed, like I've been with planning this wedding, I don't eat. I will go all day and night and then it occurs to me to eat. It's not that I even get hungry, it's that it crosses my mind that it's been 15+ hours since I've eaten.

I've also been staying away from junk food and fast food for the most part. It's just that pesky home-made baked goods that get to me. I can't help it, I like baking for my man. Easy appreciates it, so I'll keep doing it, just maybe a little less.

Exercise @ Home
My Wii Fit Plus is my best friend. I want to keep it up, but it's hard to find the time when there's so many other things I could be doing at home. But I took some time out of my day yesterday to exercise, and I hope to keep it up the on my next day off. Wish me luck!

Exercise on a Date
Easy and I took a long walk after dinner the other night. It was romantic and sweet. And it was a good exercise. I felt great after that walk. I wasn't tired like I usually am after a big dinner. I'd love to make that a routine to get in some exercise on date nights. At least while it's still warm. I'm not going for a one hour walk in Chicago past October. Maybe by then we'll go jogging instead.

Exercise Away From Home
Starting today, I'm going back to yoga classes. I figure if I go right when I get off work to the early morning class, I should be able to work it into my schedule without losing sleep or anything else. I'm going to try it out this weekend since I work three days and see how it goes. If it goes well, it will be my new plan. Toned thighs, I will welcome you back to my world shortly.

Future Hobby/Plans
I miss rock climbing and ballroom dancing. They were great ways to exercise and have fun. I'll work them into my schedule at some point. Sooner rather than later, I hope.

Bridezilla Pizza Party aka Birthday Do-Over

My fiance Easy had a birthday last week. He just turned 27, yay!

I had a birthday gathering for him that ended up being a comparison of who's friends were more flaky between mine and his. Mine ended up winning, but then again, they've only known him for a year. It's still a toss up.

My girls who are my bridesmaids decided to come by for a birthday do-over. It was really a nice surprise because I was under the impression that only Michelle was coming. But her plus 4 others came carrying pizza, beer, and wine.

They came to make up for missing Easy's birthday as well as to make sure I was okay after the bridesmaid dress fiasco. And they brought me something to make me (hopefully) laugh.

The pictures are backwards because I took them in the mirror. The top one is the back-side of the sash. It says C-Ride. There is a ridiculous story associated with that nickname that I'll explain in a second. The bottom pic is the front-side of the sash. It says Bridezilla.

They were all looking very nervous when they handed me the sash until I laughed when I saw it. Then they felt relieved. I thought it was funny. I don't know that I acted very bridezilla-ish with the bridesmaid dresses. If Camille hadn't tried to help the issue by making it 1000 times worse, there would have been no drama to begin with. but that's neither here nor there.

Besides, I mentioned before that my friends make up rumorsjust to be funny. Also, Easy said I can't be called a bridezilla because I didn't let bird poop break me. Soooooo, I embraced my new sash and my new bridezilla rumor and we got back to celebrating Easy's birthday (a week late). Mmmm, pizza from Giordano's.

Back to how I got the nickname C-Ride. I was out with my girls, apparently laying all the bonding groundwork necessary to have the perfect bride-bridesmaid relationships. We stopped by a liquor store to load up for what was sure to be a fun night.

I paid for what I purchased and the guy behind the counter balked at the name on my license. "How the hell do you pronounce this name? You know what? It doesn't matter. You need a nickname. I'm gonna call you C-Ride."

We all began laughing because C-Ride is the type of round-the-way nickname you give to someone who's got many many street credentials to back up such a name. On me, it's just ridiculous.

And instead of letting the moment pass and laughing occasionally that some stranger we never saw again chose to nickname me, my girls (and their guys) embraced the nickname wholeheartedly. It's still used to be funny, but it definitely stuck.

I'm C-Ride. Don't judge me. Judge my silly friends. In fact, Gloria's boyfriend Gregory never calls me CeCe. He only calls me C-Ride. And when she mentions me to him by name he responds, "Who is CeCe? Oh, you mean C-Ride? I don't know who CeCe is."

Okay, as I wrap this post up, I'd like to apologize for the terrible quality of the photographs. I snapped them quickly on my blackberry before I headed off to work Wednesday night. I swear I know better than to take photos in mirrors of words with light behind me. I'll do better next time.

This Is Not A Wedding-Related Post

Yes, it is. I lied. Well, not really. Just a quick thing about the wedding, and then on to another topic.

I have personally designed our save the dates, engagement party invites, etc. And it only took me two nights of free time at work. This has given me the confidence to feel like I could save hundreds of dollars by designing our invitation suite myself. Want to see our STDs? I promise I'll stop with the immature jokes. After July. When our STDs are gone. Okay, I'm done now for real.

I think they're perfect. They're fun and casual, like an STD should be (lol, sorry), but they're also setting the tone for the rest of our wedding mailings. And they feature some of my favorites of our engagement photos.
Okay, moving on from wedding stuff. I read a new blog today that I want to plug. It's pretty awesome. It's called Colorful Rants of A Sista. It's written by thundercat. She's hilarious and irreverent. And you should read her blog. But not at work.

Thank God for Google reader so my supervisor doesn't have to see that day-glow blog covered in curse words on my screen at work. But I digress.

Tomorrow morning is when I begin moving my stuff into my new apartment. I'm super excited. Easy won't be there since he got a last minute gig at the Twin Cities Jazz Festival.

It was a great opportunity, so of course he had to go. I really encouraged it,even though it wasn't my decision to make. I'm marrying a may-an, not a puppet.

But he'll be back late Friday night and we'll spend our first night in our first apartment. It's a huge relationship first and I'm super excited. Really reeeeallly excited. Wish me luck that the move goes well.

Gonna Get Married, But There's More To My Life, Part 2

This post will be all about #2 since I've already covered #1. #3 will be covered tomorrow I think. 1. Men I used to date who still don't know I'm engaged yet. 2. Looking for an apartment. 3. Settling into this new job and the financial situation that goes along with it.

2. I need to find an apartment. Both my parents and Easy's parents have expressed that they are okay (more or less) with the idea of us living together even before we're officially husband and wife.

But where do we live? Hyde Park is more appealing than it's ever been before because my friends Bada and Jordan just moved there and I love their place. Easy would like to live in Hyde Park.

There's also Wicker Park, which I love and which we can afford. There are other neighborhoods, but there's a lot to consider.

Living somewhere that's convenient for me to travel to and from work is important, but also if it's near where Easy has most of his gigs.

Being close, but not too close, to our family and friends would also be nice. Both of our churches are far south as well, so that's a consideration.

Ranking importance between finance, friends, family, work, and religion isn't easy. Plus, we have slightly different priorities when finding an apartment. I want windows, in-unit laundry, and 2 bedrooms. Easy wants practice space, artsy neighbors, and affordability. Those are not in-sync priorities, though they're not necessarily out of sync either.

If we could just pick a leasing company or brokering company, we could start finding places and go from there. But finding the time to do that is easier said than done. I just feel like we're running out of time to find an apartment with a July 1st lease.

I will feel supremely better once we start looking at places and know we can find a place that we would love and afford.

Moving In With Easy

One of my co-workers is working on furnishing her apartment, so she has catalogs from Crate & Barrel and CB2. It got me to thinknig about how Easy and I will be decorating an apartment together soon. We don't have extremely different taste, but we definitely don't have the same taste.

I want our walls covered with things we've collected from our trips to other countries as well as prints or paintings of nature. He wants framed posters of great musicians.

I want shelves and storage for everything. He wants neatly stacked piles.

I want my pink, purple, and black bedroom decorations. He wants his blue and brown decorations.

He wants a fan close by the bed. I want a humidifier close by.

These are not huge hurdles, but they are things we've sorted out from just a couple discussions and a few trips to St. Louis where his current apartment is. I'm sure before it's all said and done, there will be a lot of debating over which decoration/house arrangement works best for both of us.

But the thought of sorting that out had me again thinking of how to approach this subject with my parents. That's for another post though.

Settling Into The Job And Preparing For The Next Step

I've decided that so far I like my job. Everyone is so nice. They are always smiling and look relatively stress-free. Dealing with organ donation means dealing with people who are both receiving and giving organs and tissue. That means you deal with death. That could make for a lot of unhappy or indifferent or jaded people, but so far that's not the case.

In medical school, being in the emergency room was exciting, but also draining. I will never forget the night a 21 year old arrives at the hospital already dead. The response of the doctors and nurses was probably my second major indication that perhaps medicine wasn't for me. In my current job, the response is much better. Death is sad, but something positive can come from it. That works much better with who I am as a person.

And on to the next step. What is that next step? Why I have to find an apartment for Easy and I. And I have to find a way to break that news to my parents. My friend Bad pointed me in the right direction for where to start.

So far, I know I want to stay in the city limits of Chicago. I'd prefer to live up north because that would work better for me travelling to and from work as well as Easy going to gigs. But living south would be closer to our friends, family, and church. I think being up north might be better for Easy so he maintains that feeling of being off on his own and not so tied in to his people. It's not that he wants to be away from them, it's just that he's eager to form his own life.

So where would we live? I love Rogers Park and I hear Ravenswood or Andersonville would be right up my alley. Where are these areas? Andersonville is around Ashland between Bryn Mawr and Foster. Ravenswood is around Lawrence and Ashland. Rogers Park is around Touhy and Clark. The question would be how much apartment could we get for our money. We have to save up for whatever the next step will be, but I need, I need to be comfortable in my surroundings.

Ideally, I'd want a 2 bed, 2 bath apartment circling 1000 square feet. Paying around $1.00 per square foot sounds reasonable to me. But I'm learning this all from scratch. I've only searched for Chicago apartments occasionally over the years, and this will be the first time it has to produce real results in just a matter of weeks. Literally, like four weeks. I guess I'll start looking at options and that will help decide the step we take next.

There are some interesting looking places. Like this.
 

pics from the Apartment People


I still don't know what's going to happen next. But the apartments don't look terrible, they aren't completely out of our price range, and the location would suit what Easy and I had discussed. I do love shopping of any kind.

Any suggestions for finding a great 2 bedroom apartment in Chicago?

Operation: Don't Notice I Don't Have A Job Yet

Today is the day I am officially freaking out that I haven't heard yea or nay from the job people. I really want this job. They've checked my references, they've given me four different interviews, I'm sure they've run a background check and now know that I didn't use to go around killing people. They've probably run a credit check and know that I need a job so I can adjust my student loan repayments to match my salary.


So why nothing? It sucks people, it really truly sucks. But I refuse to wallow more than that last paragraph. So today, I'm being proactive about occupying my damn time. It works when dating a man who's not working on your schedule, and I'm betting it will work for a job offer I've yet to receive but would love to get.


So what's on the agenda for today? I'm so glad you asked. First, I'm washing clothes. I want to do that more often, but it's not always up to me when I can wash clothes because there are four people who live in this house and honestly, necessity is the only thing that grants me uninterrupted use of the machines. I hate washing clothes and not seeing process through to the end, so there will be folding and hanging in my future. How is that a good distraction? I'm kinda domestic, deal with it.


Concurrently with the washing clothes, I will be learning a new song on the piano. Just a portion of it actually. A friend of mine wants this song in a recording she's doing and she asked me to learn it so I am. I like it, it's not to difficult to play, so I'm thinking it will happen. That's also a bonus for Easy because he's been asking me to play for him and up to this point I've refused. But if I play for her, I'll definitely play for him. The thing is that I've known this girl since she was 12 and we were in our high school choir together. I accompanied the choir the entire time I was a member and even a year before, so I definitely can play for her without feeling weird about it.


After that's done, my mother and I are going to see the new Tyler Perry movie that's out. After seeing The Family That Preys, I didn't think I could see another of his movies that I knew was just going to be straight foolishness. Knowing that the man could put together a real film (that movie, Precious, For Colored Girls), it was hard to accept going to see the same Madea fluff. But I saw the previews and couldn't stop laughing. I do love the spring/summer time with it's ability to make more people go see movies so I don't have to see them alone.


And of course tonight is American Idol and America's Next Top Model. I know I've been slipping on my recaps/opinions. But seeing as how my computer actually turned on 2 days in a row, I think I'll do those tonight. And if I have some downtime, I'll actually update my other blogs too! I have a lot to get done today people, so I guess I better get to it.

Solving Problems Almost Before We Know They Exist

Saturday night, Easy, Lion, and one of Lion's frat brothers, and I all went out. We went to the bar that Lion's family owns and then we went to a club. We had a pretty good time and shared a lot of laughs.


While we were out, somehow the conversation between Easy and me turned towards how we spend our time outside of the home either in St. Louis or Chicago. I realized at that moment that we hardly ever do the type of things I would do for fun if I were by myself. We spend most of our time out listening to live music (Easy may or may not be playing), or hanging out with his or my friends (there's also music involved usually there too).


Then it occurred to me, that I'd never spoken up about doing more things that I want. My girl Top has suggested things that she knows are coming up in Chicago that I might like to go with Easy too and I didn't even really consider the possibilities because I figured we'd be busy doing something else, like listening to live music somewhere.


This realization really hit me because I hadn't even considered it before. I love listening to live music, all types of music (except bad music). So spending almost all our time outside doing that wasn't, and isn't, an issue. But it is rather one-sided. So how did we fix it? Well, before I even truly came to the realization, Easy was working on a plan to do more stuff I like. Last night, he asked me what I like to do so we could work it into the equation.


I told him I'd already told him and wondered why I, yet again, would have to repeat myself. He left it alone and we didn't really talk about it again for the rest of the night. But this morning, when I woke up, he informed me that he had planned three dates for today and the next two days that would be centered around things I've mentioned to him over the months that I like to do.


After promising that the dates weren't extravagant or expensive, I agreed to the plan. I'm kind of excited because I can't imagine what things I said I like that he actually remembered and plan on taking me to do. I have expensive taste in some respects, but I also like simple things. I hope at least one of the dates takes advantage of the warming weather here in St. Louis. It still isn't as warm as I'd like (and as the weather keeps predicting), but it's getting there.


So, after I update Rants About The Real World, and Easy finishes working on this song he's writing, we'll be off on Date #1. Well, also after we go running. Easy went running by himself yesterday. I can't leave him hanging by himself, especially when it was my idea to go running in the first place.


I promise, I'll blog about it. I'm just so happy this is how we solve conflicts. Before the problem gets fully realized, it's fixed. I don't expect us to forever do things I like and would be doing if I were alone. He still has his music and I still love life music. But it's nice to know my stuff will now be put into rotation.

I Know My Driver's License Says Illinois...

But I feel like a damn resident of Missouri. Thank God I'm not, I've got issues with some of their legislation, but I digress. It's just that a number of things have happened in the last day or two that really make me feel like I'm losing my inner Chicagoan.


First, I missed league bowling, and my team only won one game. That mostly only happens when I'm not there. I knew not contributing those extra 20-30 pins would make a difference. Also, my girls in Chicago were talking about having a girls' night Saturday night. What were my plans for Saturday night? Kicking it with Easy and Lion in East St. Louis. East St. Louis. Seriously. But I guess it's okay cause I'm spending time with two of my favorite people in the whole wide world.


And then there's the feeling of all this time I've been spending in St. Louis and what it's doing to Easy and me. When we're apart, we miss each other terribly, so it just makes sense to spend as much time together as we can. But there's also the fear of what's going to happen when our honeymoon phase ends. We've decided we're just going to stay in the honeymoon phase forever. We know it's unrealistic, but we're gonna try it anyway.


Easy and I definitely don't see the world through the same lens, but it's really not an issue because we're so good at communicating and making sure we develop a common language to bridge those differences. But when we're discussing something for the thirtieth time, there's bound to be some frustration adding into the equation. That's when I get scared because it feels like maybe the end of the honeymoon phase. But then things gets resolved and everything feels deliriously happy again. And it's not like we didn't have disagreements almost from the moment we got together. I think what makes us feel honeymoon-stage-ish still is the strong desire to resolve conflicts so we can get back to the lovey dovey happiness.


But with all this time spent in St. Louis, there's not much time for just me. At least it's starting to feel that way. I had kind of forgotten that I like to have a lot of alone time. I didn't think much of it when I was younger because my parents kept me sheltered and going out wasn't really an option, so I just hung out by myself at home. But then in college, I was hardly ever alone at any point within a given 24 hour period, but that didn't seem odd because the people I was around were so much like me, I didn't feel like I was surrounded by people, I was surrounded by versions of myself.


So now, in the new world that includes Easy, there isn't much room for me being me, in my own space. We're working on it though. For instance, early Saturday evening, Easy had a gig. This is a gig I've never gone with him to even though I've been in town for it. But this time, I didn't even ride there with him. I didn't drop him off at the church and then head to the mall. I just stayed at his place and spent some time by myself. And it made me happy. And it made me miss him. I was looking forward to him coming back and telling me about his gig and how it went.


Hopefully, a few small changes here and there can solve the problem. For most people, who they are and what they prefer fundamentally is up for negotiation in the context of a relationship, and there are growing pains. I'm prepared to handle it (I think), and I'm looking forward to a time when solving this problem of me having "me time" is a thing of the past. And I suppose I'll wait til the not-having-time-for-my-friends-in-Chicago thing becomes more of a problem before we tackle that.

Creating Things Day Eleven - Chocolate Chip Peanut Butter Cookies

I didn't get a chance to sit down and write this post until after midnight, but this is what I made yesterday, Wednesday, January 12, 2011.

I made cookies. I had been wanting to make cookies for about a week now.

It would be a waste to make them at my parents' house. All that healthy eating is not a good environment for cookies.

But I knew that making them in St. Louis when I came to see Easy.

But of course, as always with him, the day was delayed. So I didn't even get started on the cookies until the night was almost done.

And to add to it, I forgot to take pictures until the dough was already made up.

Can I take a moment to say this is the most work I've ever put into making cookies?

This is a true bachelor pad out here in St. Louis.

They have hardly anything needs for basic baking.

The biggest thing missing was a mixer. I had to mix the cookies by hand. With a fork. That's right a dinner fork!

But I finally got the dough mixed and added in the chips. Doesn't it look delicious?

The recipe was the basic Pillsbury recipe, but I substituted some of the chocolate chips for Reese's Peanut Butter Chips.

I love Reese's cups, so I thought the switch would be tasty.

I got the first set of cookies onto the cookie sheet and into the oven.

I'm not used to baking in this oven so the first batch looked just okay. They smelled wonderful and tasted great though.

Each successive batches (the recipe made a lot of cookies) looked even better.

Easy and I had a great dessert of cookies and milk.

The addition of the peanut butter chips was great for me since I'm not a huge fan of chocolate chip cookies.

I would definitely recommend that Pillsbury recipe (just don't tell them I used Nestle Tollhouse semi-sweet chips, lol).

More About Christmas Gifts

The girls' night one of my friends planned actually happened tonight.

I will say that I didn't expect the night to happen.

My friends aren't flaky, just occasionally otherwise occupied.

But most of us ended up at Gloria's house tonight.

We were catching up on holiday events and activities. I haven't seen most of them since Christmas Eve.

One of the things that came up were questions about when Easy was getting back from Europe.

I told them of how we were exchanging gifts once he gets back on Monday.

Easy actually suggested that I come over to his parents' house that night and we all exchange gifts together.

That prompted Michelle to bring up the fact that I had to purchase two Christmas gifts for him.

They all want to know the story of course.

I start by showing them the pic on my cell phone of the bracelet he already owns that he wanted me to find a chain to match.

I told them about first attempting to shop online and showed them what showed up in the mail.

They all started cracking up and asking me was I really considering giving a grown man a gift that looks like I purchased it somewhere named "Hood Jewelry Pagoda".

So then I told them about dragging Michelle out to purchase a much better chain and pulled out the box.

They immediately showed relief as they saw that the gift came in a real jewelry box and had a warranty.

They all said maybe he wouldn't immediately leave me if I gave him the second chain.

Then they started cracking jokes about how his family would react if I showed up to their house to exchange gifts and they saw the first under-whelming chain in the crappy box.

They suggested I use the gift as a gag gift, but I was like, "um no, I'll probably have told Easy about this before he gets back"

That, plus I don't want his family to know that I purchased such a wrong gift at first.

They didn't stop laughing for a while. I'm glad to be a source of amusement to my friends.

But I think I did pretty good for a first gift. Especially considering I usually just go for cuff links.

I'm branching out of my box. I seem to keep doing that with Easy. Eh, whatever.

New Year"s Day

All of 2010, except for Thanksgiving, we did the holidays really low key.

Not nearly as much food or guests over has become the norm.

It's just nice because there is much less stress about getting everything ready.

I think for 2011, I'll be ready for more fuss and fanfare again, maybe.

But today, I'm enjoying the relaxed nature of the day.

No waking up early to help set the table because there was no 8-10 person table to set!

That makes me particularly happy because I didn't get in until 4:30 am this morning.

I really had a lot of fun last night, see?

What did we end up doing? "We" is me, Michelle, Bad, and Jordan.

Well, first we went to this lovely restaurant for tapas.

We also ordered a great bottle of rose cava to do our toast with plus we got complimentary glasses of champagne.

And the food was fantastic. My favorite was the steak with bleu cheese.

Then we picked up one of Bad's best friends and his cousin and the party continued.

The only thing I didn't want for New Year's Eve was driving all over the city. But I wasn't driving, Bad was.

And to make things even better, it was soooo warm here last night. It was above 50 at one point.

So, there was no scary ice and snow out to confuse all the drunk happy people.

We ended up trying about three different bars before we found one that was open late enough and free (for us) to get in and the DJ was in a festive mood.

We ended up dancing for a couple hours and just really having a good time.

I even ran into an old friend from high school that I see every couple of years out at some club around downtown Chicago; it was nice seeing him again.

All in all, it was the perfect new year's eve.

I actually got the grown-up Chicago-style New Year's Eve I wanted. So unexpected, but definitely appreciated.

An Unplanned Evening

Easy wasn't able to get online tonight. Which sucks.

There could have been any number of reasons why he wasn't able to.

The wifi could've shut down at the hotel. Or his roommate could've been using the laptop. Or he could've fell asleep.

They've been on a hectic schedule since they got there. They've been almost literally all over Spain.

Even though I really miss Easy and was looking forward to talking to him, not talking to him tonight taught me something.

I am okay if something doesn't pan out like he says it would.

A number of weeks ago in the not so distant past, that would have been a huge red flag and I would be looking to run unless he had a really good explanation.

But today, my trust is not so easily shaken. I'm able to think of lots of plausible reasons why he wasn't where he said he'd be.

The evening ended up being quite eventful. Michelle and her sister came over. They stayed for quite a while. We were watching tv and laughing and joking.

It would've been fantastic fun if it weren't for the fact that my nasal passages were becoming more and more inflamed and I couldn't really breathe right.

And to make matters worse, every other commercial on the tv promised solutions to nasal congestion. And all the commercials fixed inflammation, not mucus.

It was like being taunted. I wasn't going to leave the house to go get medicine. The last time I left the house, I got sick.

A discussion of New Year's Eve came up and nothing got settled. I don't know what's going to happen.

I may just stay sick so I can't go out rather than feel disappointed.

I guess we'll see what happens.

But back to Easy. I wish I had an outside interpretation of my reaction to his not being able to chat online tonight.

Is it that I really am gaining more genuine trust for him or is it that being in love blinds me and makes me more accepting of flaws (at least in the early stages)?

Top always says that saying "I love you" is the easy part.

It's the time after that when things get tough because then you have to back it up. I hope me having more trust is a starting example.

Spending Time With My Family

I wrote a post this morning about spending time with Easy's family.

His family loves to have fun and loves to laugh. My family is the same way.

But today I realized how close our senses of humor really are.

His family has a lot of fun cracking jokes and making fun. You definitely have to have thick skin.

If you do or say something funny, it will be brought up again and again and again. Stories will be told for the enjoyment of everyone around you.

Tonight my parents came home from work and we sat down to dinner. We were laughing and cracking jokes about our family and friends etc.

There were stories to share about the time we spent apart (including a funny story from dinner when I was in St. Louis).

The only difference between my family and his is my family adds an element of physical comedy.

If there's a story being told, the person the story is about has to be physically imitated as well. It's just funnier that way.

In that respect, Easy's sister would probably be the favorite in my family because she's the only I can remember physically imitating someone she's joking about.

What can I say? Spending time with my family just makes me feel like the holidays are approaching.

My parents and I eat dinner together pretty regularly when everyone is in town. But it seems like we spend more time at it when the holidays are upon us.

And there are always funny stories that come from it. Such as, after dinner my mom had us all cracking up.

She asked me to get her hair bonnet that she sleeps in because she was going to lie down before bed.

She requested that I look on the dining room table for the sleep bonnet that was in the red bag next to the wig.

I go to the dining room table and see a red purse with wig on the table next to the bag. I look in the purse and announce that I don't see the bonnet.

Then as she's coming down the stairs to investigate, I notice another red bag on the dining room chair. This bag happens to also have a wig in it. Next to the wig is... the sleep bonnet.

So she meant the wig next to the bonnet, not next to the bag. And she meant near the table, not on it.

We were both cracking up at the fact that there were two red bags and two wigs and how it was understandable that I would get those instructions wrong.

No wonder I'm such a stickler for people saying what they mean and meaning what they say.

I truly believe I would have found the bonnet the first time had she said on the chair not on the table. But who knows?

One thing for sure is that my family always provides a good time.

Seems Like My Weekends In Chicago Are Dedicated To Friends!

Well, at least my Saturdays are dedicated to friends!

Tonight will be a fun night for me. Anyone who reads my other blog will know tomorrow about part of my evening.

It's my friend Sonny's birthday. Well, it was yesterday. His get together at his house is tonight however.

And honestly, I feel a bit out out of place going there by myself because there always seems to be the overgrowth of couples. So I usually bring someone with me.

Last time I went, I brought Leo. Which was a fun night. I'm not being sarcastic.

This time I'm bringing Michelle. No need to turn Sonny's birthday thing into a date. Plus Easy is still in St. Louis until Tuesday.

Michelle has already met Sonny and Cher twice. Once when I moved from Rockford to Chicago and once during our birthday party last month.

I think that makes her a good person to bring to the party/get together. And after that, she and I are heading up north!

We are going to see this R&B group that a friend of hers is in. I love love love live music, so I'm excited to go hear his group play.

There's an interesting story about this guy. Another friend of ours from our teenage years at church is his ex. As far as I know, they haven't spoken much since she moved away, but they're still friends.

Michelle and this guy have become pretty close over the years. They're not dating, they're also just friends.

But let me put it this way. His dad constantly tells Michelle that he'd love her to be his future daughter-in-law.

And our friend who is his ex has just moved back to Chicago. And she doesn't know how close Michelle and this guy are. And she definitely doesn't know his dad is planning their wedding.

This chick is really easy going, so I don't expect this to lead to any major problems. But it will be very interesting if she ends up going out with us tonight.

So, for a number of reasons, I'm looking forward to tonight.

Being Busy Leads To Interesting Blog Posts

I do have interesting blog posts, but this may not be one of them.

This post is mostly to gloss over the time since I've last posted and suss out what needs its own post (that will truly be interesting).

I've been missing the last five days, which isn't unusual at all. People get busy stuff happens. But I have been having an interesting five days that I will now share.

I'll start with Saturday. Saturday was amazing! My mother, grandmother, and I had fun out at the movies. There were lots of inter-generational groups there seeing this movie. It looked like a scene from Madea's Family Reunion.

For Colored Girls was a movie I really enjoyed. I didn't know if I would, but I did. I'm glad I went to see it.

Dinner out with my friends was really nice. We all haven't spent an evening together in a long time. But I'll write more about that on Camille's, Gloria's, or Michelle's page on my other blog.

Easy's show went really well. It was a big deal because it was his quartet's first show. So I'm glad it went well. And if things stay like they are now, I'll definitely be at the next one.

Sunday was a good day, rather uneventful as far as things I usually blog about. I meant to put up a post about whether I got my goals for last week accomplished. But Sunday was busy with church stuff. So I'll put it up today or tomorrow.

Monday, I spent more time with my grandmother in the morning. Then I had yoga. Then I spent the evening with Leo. I'll tell that story in a later post as well. It's actually more than just Monday night. It's a story about both Monday and Tuesday nights. And Saturday. And Sunday. Kind of crazy.

I had a bit of a freak out Sunday night and almost cancelled my trip down to St. Louis to see Easy. I'll write a post about what happened with that, but I'm going to ruin the ending. I'm in St. Louis right now.

Even though my yoga studio is a national chain, they don't have yoga studios in St. Louis. Surprise surprise. So I've been doing yoga myself in the mornings when I wake up. I almost remember everything. So I'm keeping my workout plan going.

Easy and I have spent some time with Lion while down here. He's had some interesting developments in his love life. So I may need to figure out how to put him back in rotation in my other blog. At least for a couple of weeks.

And now I'm going to go catch up on my reading of all your wonderful blogs!

Girls' Day Out, Girls' Night Out, No Boys Allowed

I'm really excited about the day I have in front of me. The type of social life I'd like to have doesn't include going out to clubs every night. I never wanted that, not even in college.

The type of social life I'd like includes a mix of activities that allows me to have fun with people I care about in my life. Today is a great day for that.

At 4pm, I'm going to see Colored Girls with my mother and grandmother. I wasn't sure I was going to see this movie because Tyler Perry and I don't get along with serious subject material, but I'm going and I plan on enjoying both my time with these women and the movie.

Then tonight, I'm going out to dinner with Michelle, Gloria, Camille, Michelle's twin cousins (Thing 1 and Thing 2), and two to three of our other friends from church. We're just grabbing dinner and maybe seeing where the night goes after that.

Easy wanted me to not have a girls' day this weekend and to come down to St. Louis to see him and his show. He was supposed to have a boys' weekend and that kind of fell through. And now his parents are coming down. And staying in his house.

And he still asked me one more time yesterday to reconsider. This is after us making plans for when I'm coming down on Tuesday. The only two reasons I'm not completely pissed about him asking me to change my plans is that he's just impulsive like that and this show is a big deal for him.

Easy is impulsive. I may have said that two or eight times on this blog. But he just says whatever idea he fancies at the time, regardless of whether it turns out he will still mean it when he stops to think about it. It's his man-stupid. But I know he wouldn't actually expect me to cancel previous plans with almost all the important women in my life for him. Not unless it was really important. Like really important. Like a family member's funeral.

And like I said, this show is a big deal for him. Easy is an elementary school teacher. But he's also a musician. And tonight he's accomplishing one of his goals/dreams of having a show with his own jazz quartet. The venue he's playing at asked him to do the show, which is also huge.

I do support him in this venture, but being physically there for him just wasn't possible. But we've been talking about it a lot and I think he knows how much I support him and what he's doing tonight.

So I will be praying for him that everything goes well and that his parents have a good visit with him. And I'll be doing some great sisterhood-of-the-travelling-pants-type bonding today! Well, I don't know that to be true. I've never seen that movie. But there will be some type of bonding going on.

The Foundation For Building A Life Is...

Taking care of home, at least as much as I can.

What does taking care of home involve? Not much seeing as how I don't have a home of my own. But since I've moved back home, my parents' home is now mine too. For now.

So how can I make things better? By not forgetting that I also help mess things up. I have been out of practice for cleaning up. Sure, I make dinner occasionally. But that is more about helping my parents maintain their new eating habits than helping out around the house.

Since today is Saturday, I'm completely single, and have no obligations today, I will help clean up the house. I will actually make my bed, but that's the least of the issues. I can vacuum, wash dishes, etc.

I can be a useful member of the household. That will give me a sense of accomplishment. And I'm sure my parents will love that I'm being a more contributory member of the family.

And once I've given myself a happier home environment, the next step in building my life foundation will be making sure I'm at peace with myself. I think that will be decided based on a look at if my focus in yoga has been effective.

Countdown to the life I want: 3 years, 11 months, 18 days.

Enough About My Life aka An Escape From Reality

This post is not going to be some discussion of my views of myself of my life or whatever. No, it's time to take a break from that. Why am I taking a break from that today? Because I do what I want. And also, it's better this way. No one wants to read my rambling stream of consciousness about not yet having a job or being frustrated about a guy or lamenting that my friends are so busy or yet another post about how much I love my Kindle or yoga (which I totally do by the way).


But this is not about me. At least not today. This is about fall network television. Ever since I moved back home, I'm finding lots of things to love about my parents' DVR. It's not Comcast ONDemand, but it does have it's benefits. I'm seeing the depth of those benefits these past two weeks. CBS, NBC, ABC, FOX, etc. have all had their season premiers of the shows, new and old, that I've been dying to see.

I love my summer cable programming (I loooove yooou Psych and Leverage and White Collarrrrrrr!!!!!), but there's something to be said about the drama of new fall programming. It lacks some of the whimsy of the summer, but the characters are more like the people you'd run into on the street, not just someone so awesome you wish they existed in real life (I'm looking at you Sean and Gus, you too Hardison and Parker).

Because of the DVR, I've been able to watch all the shows I want to watch, without having to use the internet the next day. For instance, Monday night brings How I Met Your Mother, Dancing With The Stars, House, and 90210. I can watch two and record two. I've done this Sunday through Thursday and I love it! I usually don't catch up on all the shows til Saturday late afternoon, but the days of having to choose are over!

What about the cable shows that have new fall programming too? Well, I don't watch most of the reality shows, MTV is evil, but I do notice that cable shows have re-runs. Waaay more re-runs that network television. I watched the final battle of Chopped Champions at 1:00 am last night. I wasn't stressed about catching it at 8 pm or 9 pm or whatever time it came on.

Watching Brandy and Maksim argue, or Naomi deal with the aftermath of her lies and her attack, or Tyra sussing out America's Next Top Model makes my evenings pass with joy. I never had much going on in the evenings before besides studying. It's just nice, at least this fall, to take advantage of all my free time and really delve deeply into someone else's life.